The Kindred Black and Brown, Blessed Trans & Sacred Queers
I am sorry for your breaking hearts
Our breaking hearts
My breaking heart
I am sorry that we continue to witness those who say they are allied to us give in to their privilege repeatedly
that you are watching them say things like this is the last one or I’m going for “community” not to support the event
that they are telling themselves that they are going to protect YOU!
that they mistook a walk out, a leaving, a pulling up of roots, a divestment as some simple boycott
I’m sorry they act like this is one small thing when it is symptomatic of the greater diseases:white supremacy and transphobia
that your pain is treated as an inconvenience even unto your own people
They can’t see how this is greater than a weekend, an event, a single moment in time.
Here is my prayer for you
for me in this New Year
May our aching fingers finally ease from the grip of continuing to hold on to skin folk who ain’t kinfolk, from false allies who speak love but remain “conflicted”
May we let go of the responsibility of mending and protecting those who will neither mend nor protect us
May they in all their excuses be revealed like torch bearers on a Charlottesville night
May our palms open so these people can flow from them
So that our empty hands can be filled instead with all the blessings this melanated, binary gender refuting and queer as fuck Universe has to offer us
May your heart be soothed by the centering of your sacred self
Those without the privilege of choice
without the illusion of isolated events
unwilling to love something that does not love them back
You do not nor have you ever asked for too much
You are so deserving of the birthright of your own humanity
May you have it
Every ounce of it
May you never hunger for it
May you never thirst
“I Love Myself More Than I Love This Shit” 2019 Black & Brown Queer/ Trans Pantheacon Walkout & Divestment
*Audio of my words captured by Meredith Simon. Meredith I am beyond grateful for this gift.
*Rallying call of “I love myself more than I love this shit” crafted with the incomparable Beverley Smith. This phrase has become a central guiding force in my life. Thank you for your wisdom.
*Procession lead by Xochiquetzal Duti Odinsdottir. Xochi your willingness to bare your teeth, grasp the staff and part the waters allowed me to pull up the roots and sweep up the last of our wake without concern. Thank you for holding the line.
*The final chants led by Jacki Chuculate know that I am so grateful for you finishing this work with reminders that it is larger than this bubble. That this is all part of a whole. Thank you for lending your energy when I had none left. For sealing this action and focusing us on what we do next.