I believe You love me

I have educated myself on the subject of you since this body has been made for you and I sincerely believe that You love me

one day
one day I’m gonna rise up singing
I’ll fly away, in the morning
to lay my burden down by Your river
I’ll be washed clean was the promise
so I know You love me

You’ve loved me since the day I was born
followed me closely through a reckless childhood just a hair away from my skin but You never touched me
instead You painted green leaves with fire for me every year
showed me the beauty of stillness in the snow
took people and places from me in teaching me to better hold the smallest moments in the mindful memory of my heart
not just my head

You are not landlord of a fleshed house that isn’t mine
You are instructor, healer, comforter, reminder, protector…you love me
You are not a faceless scythe or knife to sever threads woven on the loom
You are twisted in this thread
Ribbon and the Maypole
and as each circle of this dance bringing us closer together I find myself wondering

What will I taste like to You when you finally catch me in your arms?

when my eyes are so full of the sight of You that I’ll see nothing else
when Your lips press a seal to mine and take my breath away
when Your touch bestills my beating heart

I know we’ve flirted before but when it’s real I hope
that maybe
can it be
how I wanted my first time to be

on the perfect evening with white curtains of gossamer waltzing on honeysuckle breezes
a sunset You orchestrated giving way to the first stars
lay besides me in a big beautiful bed, touch me with a gentleness informed by an exquisite expertise
if You would only wait-
wait until I’m ready for You and I promise my smile will be a heaven full of stars for You to fall into
my lips, sweet with this life I’ve lived well in wait of You
If You would only wait-
I’ll open my arms to embrace You
surrender with sighed breath and love You
as You came
as You come

for me.